BEGINNING PART II
(http://www.westernvoices.com/audio/john_young/prost2of4.mp3)
The fourth factor that all five women had in common was exposure to a particular aspect of feminism that equates promiscuity — even sex with married men for one’s own pleasure — with liberation. This point of view is far from new. It was given voice by prominent feminist Helen Gurly Brown in one of the most popular books ever written on the topic, called “Sex and the Single Girl,” published in 1962. Unambiguously hostile to marriage, Ms. Brown encouraged entire generations of women through Cosmopolitan magazine to use men — not as fully developed human beings — but as dildos with a body attached. The sole purpose of men was to cater to women’s sexual and materialistic whims. Listeners should take note that Cosmopolitan puts out an edition just for teens that should not, under any circumstances, find its way into the hands of our daughters. Just like the version for adults, it is poison.
So-called “Women’s Studies” departments in colleges have professors that run the gamut from radical feminists who think all sex is rape through the liberal feminists who preach that promiscuity is liberation. This is a common theme in the three books read by all five prostitutes I interviewed. These books were assigned in “Women’s Studies” or even required courses they had taken in colleges in Massachusetts.
To give you a feeling for the transformative power of these books, one lady reviewing the book “Whores and other Feminists” demonstrated the deadly nexus of feminism and materialism and how they discard the most important aspects of human character when she wrote: “The perspectives presented in Nagle’s revolutionary book made me re-think a lot of my politically correct feminist dogma. I realized that perhaps prostitutes are not victims at all. In fact, they may possibly be the most empowered women of all. Men are charged for every minute they spend with them, they screen their clients, and they don’t sugar coat the services they provide with foolish and dishonest romantic rhetoric.
I was left with the astonishing conclusion that misogyny’s victims are most often housewives, mistresses and girlfriends. These women allow men free access to their bodies, plus they serve as maids, cooks, nurturers, escorts, masseuses and companions. Whores prove that a woman’s time and sexual attention has real economic value. This book is a must read for any critical thinker. It will change you.”(13)
Well, it might not change most people; but it could certainly exercise influence over a young woman with a hole in her heart from a missing father, a materialistic focus, and a mother who had deliberately reduced her father’s participation to nothing more than a weekly check.
Think, carefully, about what this reviewer is saying. The correct term for Marxism is “Dialectical Materialism.” Most feminist dogma put forth in college these days is Marxist — and hence materialist — inspired. The focus is not on women as human beings, but rather on women as economic entities who are empowered economically in a finite-pie scenario by selling access to their bodies in such a way that their economics are enhanced while those of men are diminished. She has taken the materialistic premise that is common to Marxism to the ultimate extreme.
Look at how unhealthy this attitude is. Instead of seeing men and women as complementary, she sees them in opposition such that the advancement of one always requires the diminishing of the other. This is a natural outgrowth of seeing men and women as economic entities rather than full human beings.
Meanwhile, Pateman’s book, “The Sexual Contract” is usually assigned as part of a mandatory class on Race and Gender in American Politics. Thus, many people are exposed to it. The prose makes for a rather difficult read, meaning she would disproportionately influence women who are brighter than average. I could go on and on about the inaccuracies and flawed reasoning in this book, but the bottom line is that, in the chapter titled “What’s Wrong with Prostitution,” she makes a very strong case for prostitution as personal empowerment and fulfillment.
Some people believe that European-derived people have a natural tendency toward monogamy, Dr. Kevin MacDonald among them(14). This tendency would a form of implicit processing. Feminist points of view, on the other hand, exist as explicit processing in the frontal cortex. As Dr. Kevin MacDonald explained rather thoroughly in an article entitled “White Psychology,” explicit processing can override implicit processing.(15) Thus, even if a natural tendency toward monogamy exists, it can be overridden by explicit beliefs inculcated by feminist philosophy.
So let me add these four things together. I am not saying that any one of these factors, in and of itself, is sufficient to turn an otherwise ordinary college student into a prostitute. But, when you inculcate a spiritually empty materialistic and consumerist mindset that concentrates on money without regard to its source, raise young women in homes with no biological father present, cater to the worst aspects of their innate hypergamic tendencies and then top it off with explicit teaching from authority figures on the value of prostitution; if a girl is of above-average attractiveness and has some degree of sexual confidence — it’s hard to imagine how she manages to escape that path.
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As I mentioned earlier, I also interviewed clients to get a look at prostitution from a different perspective. Overall, it is estimated that 16% of American men buy sex. Here, that is illegal, so the number is likely under-reported. Some experts believe it is over 30%. In places like Spain and Germany where prostitution is legal, 40% and 75% of men — respectively — have paid for sex. The behavior is sufficiently prevalent that most psychologists do not consider the behavior of purchasing sex as pathological in and of itself.(16) It is also prevalent enough that any examination of our Folk that ignores the pervasiveness of prostitution is incomplete.
There are a lot of theories as to why men buy sex ranging from the relatively benign desire for uncomplicated intimacy to a desire to exercise social dominance. Comprehensive studies of men who pay for sex, though, find no psychological or personality disorders out of proportion with the general population.(17)
So rather than accept some sort of slanted information, I talked to the men who buy sex.
First, I interviewed two married men who frequented escorts.
While the details between the two differ somewhat, both reported that their wives had left them without sex for about two years before they actively considered being unfaithful. As I have previously reported, about 1 in 3 visits that women make to doctors in the United States are for a prescription or refill of an anti-depressant medication. One of the most notorious side-effects of anti-depressants is suppression of sex drive. In the case of one man, that is what he reported to be the case: that shortly after his wife started on anti-depressants she had lost all interest in sex and wouldn’t accommodate him. He had come to see even proposing sexual relations to his wife as an unwanted imposition. Sure, he still loved her; and that is why, he said, he chose a prostitute over an affair. An affair, he said, had a great deal more potential to harm the woman he loved.
The other married man was unable to meet his wife’s expectations for living standards. For years she had spent thousands of dollars monthly on conspicuous consumption and he was unable to shoulder both that AND a home in the *particular* neighborhood she desired; or, at least, he thought that meeting that expectation was not a financially sensible decision. When he failed to meet this latter expectation, sex stopped. This particular man is a proud man, and very accomplished in a number of ways. He is rightfully proud of the thousands of lives he has saved. This is a game his wife was playing where she felt she could manipulate certain decisions from him by withholding sex. It turns out, though, that he is not the sort of man to beg. As he said, he will not condescend to beg for sex from his own wife. He gave her two years to stop cutting him off, after which he simply replaced her sexual role with a prostitute. Again, like the first man, he saw a prostitute as an option that would preserve the non-sexual aspects of the marriage without other risk.
Obviously, these two married men don’t answer for all — because we all know that some men are just dogs, and the higher up the socioeconomic ladder a man goes, the greater is his drive for sexual novelty. Nevertheless, the white men I interviewed definitely broach important issues; specifically the ridiculous levels of anti-depressant use among our women and accompanying lack of sexual desire along with the tired old use of sex as a tool for manipulation where a legal monopoly exists. The first man felt bad about what he was doing, but the second was unapologetic. He said: “I was faithful to my wife for ten years; and waited for her to stop playing manipulative games for two years. Well, guess what? She lost. If she ever starts treating me like a man again, I’ll drop the escorts. Until then, she has made herself redundant.”
I understand the way these men are thinking, but I believe their efforts are misguided.
These are not easy issues, but by sneaking out the back door and failing to confront them; these men are really wimping out. They are conceding ground that should be theirs as the co-equal partners in a marriage. Then again, they aren’t REALLY equal partners in marriage, which is the problem.
In the first case, most depression can be effectively addressed with *competent* therapy that uncovers what are usually misconceptions and unrealistic expectations and replaces them with ideas that are more realistic; as well as making changes to the environment. In other words, if a woman is depressed because she hates her job, then the solution may not require either therapy or pills. It may simply require some night classes followed by a search for a more enjoyable occupation.
Let’s have a reality check. Humankind would never have survived past the caveman days if 1/3rd of adult females in a community needed antidepressants and tranquilizers to cope; and I guarantee you that life was a lot tougher then than it is today. And, yes, as amazing as it may seem, according to an article in Scientific American: “Remarkably, in 2002 more than one in three doctor’s office visits by women involved the prescription of an antidepressant, either for the writing of a new prescription or for the mainten ance of an existing one, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.”(18) Humans — men and women alike — are very resilient creatures. With a few exceptions for various organic brain problems; most people are on anti-depressants because that’s what insurance companies push as a quick-fix; not because of some sort of genetically-inspired imbalance of neurotransmitters. It’s simply cheaper to put a depressed woman on a psychoactive drug than to pay for therapy to figure out why she is depressed and fix it.
There’s a good reason for this. Most so-called therapists are pretty horrendous. The field of psychology is full of Marxist-inspired wacky voodoo that in many cases does more harm than good. Because of this, a lot of therapy is ineffective. In the case of depression, studies indicate that standard approaches to psychotherapy are no more effective than placebo pills.(19) Not only that, the advice that many married women receive from therapists is to ditch devoted husbands! Insurance companies aren’t keen on spending thousands of dollars on chicanery; so they do the next best thing by limiting the number of visits they will pay for, and steering health care providers toward prescribing anti-depressants that will mask the symptoms. The trouble is that with pills masking the symptoms, the motivation for uncovering the true problem disappears.
The problem that the fellow I interviewed revealed, is that, combined with the fact that women’s drive for sex naturally declines in marriage anyway(20), anti-depressants — SSRIs particularly — are well known to cause sexual dysfunction. In fact, they cause sexual dysfunction in 60% of the people taking them(21); and even after the drugs are discontinued, sexual dysfunction commonly occurs for an extended period of time.(22) This shouldn’t be shocking, because one little-known fact is that SSRIs are commonly prescribed to pedophiles for the explicit purpose of destroying their sex drive!(23)
Here’s the thing. If a man’s wife is depressed, she is depressed for a reason — and the pills just cover it up. The solution doesn’t lie in seeking out prostitutes to compensate for the loss of consortion with one’s wife; but rather to do diligent research to find truly competent non-Marxist sources of therapy for her. After all, that IS part of a husband’s job description. He should *not* encourage her to immediately drop the anti-depressants, because that can cause her to commit either murder or suicide. But he needs to invest as much energy into finding competent help for his wife as he has invested into finding escorts that suit his fancy.
In the second case, let’s be realistic, this man married a gold-digging, status-symbol loving and materialistic woman to start with. Such women are never a good deal. When you go fishing, a lot of what you catch depends upon what you use for bait; and if you go running around using ostentatious displays of wealth as bait, you shouldn’t be shocked at what you catch. But now that he has made solemn vows to the wife he bought, the husband needs to deal with what he’s got.
I understand that, in some of these cases where the woman holds divorce and financial ruin over a man’s head like a headsman’s ax about to fall as a means to keep a man from even daring to broach a subject, the hapless husband feels impotent and powerless. It is extremely common for men in these circumstances to seek the solace of a fantasy as an escape for just a couple of hours — and I can understand that. That’s because, usually, when a significant other withholds sex, she also withholds all of the emotional support that goes with the territory so a man can feel more like a slave than a husband. One gender researcher noted that prostitutes can offer men in such circumstances “… emotional involvement, psychic stability and empathy.”(24) As one of the prostitutes I interviewed explained to me, “Overly demanding and prudish wives, girlfriends and fiances who won’t lay their men and cut them off from getting laid are MY best friends.”
But at the same time, the husband needs to come to grips with that reality so he can confront it and change it. Taking solace from a prostitute getting paid by the hour only serves to make a situation that should be unbearable, bearable; and thereby decreases the incentives to make the changes needed to the situation.
I completely understand that when a man agrees to monogamy, there is an implicit promise that his wife will make a good-faith effort to build and maintain a healthy sexual relationship. When she stops having sex, especially as some form of spite or manipulation, she has broken the contract. After all, he agreed to monogamy, not chastity. By enforcing chastity instead, the agreement has been broken. However, sneaking out to see a prostitute puts the man in a morally inferior position and takes away his standing as having a valid complaint.
Many men are in such fear of their wives, and what their wives could do to them in court, that they would rather engage a prostitute than confront the women they love at a basic level. This is unfortunate and needs to be corrected. If the wife withholds sex with the intent of causing emotional distress, that is tortious. Don’t cheat on her, sue her for divorce on FAULT grounds. In states where fault-based divorce is still on the books — and that is most of them — a finding of fault on the part of the wife will put the husband in a better position than he would otherwise be under a no-fault filing. This may be difficult — so consult with an attorney to see what you need to do in advance to establish a solid case.
In simple terms, its time for men like this to “grow a set.” Sometimes, you know, it is better to take your lumps for bad decisions than live a life of lies.
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Now, let us look at the unmarried men.
Again, the details differ; but both stated outright that they had no plans or desire to ever marry. Neither was ambiguous at all about why. One stated: “Look, I know what marriage is all about: it’s about giving some b_tch who hates your guts half of your paycheck for 18 years while she f_cks someone else. Count me out.” The other, a young doctor, wasn’t quite so crude. He said: “My best friend killed himself because a court wouldn’t let him see his kids. Call me crazy, but I never want to be there.” These particular men are part of the marriage strike who will never marry.(25) These men use prostitutes because they don’t carry the financial and emotional risk that comes with marriage in the current era. The young doctor put it pretty straight when he said: “I can get a gorgeous call girl and be treated like a king for just $300. That’s less than the cost of taking a date to a show, and I know the call girl won’t come down with a headache afterwards or make my life miserable over something stupid.” The other guy was philosophical: “I’m not looking for commitment. Anyone I date is going to get hurt because I won’t commit. Escorts are a great solution.”
I have some thoughts for these single men.
As President Clinton would say, I can feel their pain. Up until about eight years ago, I was a single man for several years as well. Few things are as discouraging, demoralizing and soul-sapping as dating within a solidly left-wing metropolitan area. I had no trouble getting dates — getting a date is certainly not difficult. But finding someone with his or her head screwed on straight in such an environment is a serious challenge. And I am also sympathetic to concerns stemming from our incredibly biased court system that turns men into slaves serving women who hate them at the snap of a finger. I’m very familiar with a world view that sees men — not as human beings — but as wallets on legs, avenues to lifestyles, and even status symbols. I’ve seen it all. So I can sympathize with these young men.
BUT they are taking the coward’s way out. They realize that, from a legal perspective, they are at a severe disadvantage in dealing with women in normal relationships. They are boycotting those relationships because the legal power differential is so extreme that even their primal sex drive can’t override their fear. But rather than trying to fix that problem through properly focused advocacy with established father’s rights groups or finding a good woman whose ethics would negate that disadvantage, they instead put their heads in the sand and pay a prostitute to get their jollies.
Part of this is because they fail to understand themselves. As a result, they are unable to compensate for their weaknesses and instead they accentuate them.
Here’s a newsflash: men are very visual creatures. We generally aim for the absolute prettiest woman who will have us. The trouble lies in social conventions that influence the basic conception of what constitutes a pretty woman; which pushes men NOT toward truly pretty women, but often the most artificial, cunning and manipulative of women. Because women are much more skilled at picking up emotions, non-verbal cues and so forth; these highly visual men are at an extreme disadvantage when dealing with women of this type. They are setting themselves up to be temporary place-holders for ambitious women who will discard them the minute someone with a thicker wallet comes along.
Being able to deal effectively with modern women and the challenges posed by female hypergamy requires substantial skill and knowledge along with the confidence needed to both confront and dump women when needed. Never be afraid that if you dump a woman — or she dumps you — you will never get another girlfriend or wife. From the conversations I’ve had with close female friends, I’ve learned that men can seldom bring themselves to dump a girl; even if they have decided the girl is unsuitable and they are actively cheating on her. It’s really time to reclaim some honor here, stop the cheating, and dump girls who are unsuitable.
Some of the theory and knowledge a young man needs can come from books; but the skill to apply that knowledge in the real world with real women can only come from experience with real women in the real world, no matter how difficult that may be. And one of the most important skills is being able to detect women with shallow consumerist values upon an initial meeting or a first date. When you get sufficiently experienced, you can often identify women you’d be better off avoiding at a glance. With this knowledge and experience, you can refine the specific attributes you find most important in a woman. Being male, beauty is always going to be high on that list; but you need to be realistic in rejecting consumerist notions of beauty. Along with this, with a bit of experience in the real world you will come to quickly recognize the non-physical traits you really want in a woman, and the traits that are really the most important in a woman, and you’ll learn how to identify their presence or absence within minutes of meeting her.
Keep in mind that fully HALF of marriages do NOT end in divorce. This means that if you redefine your priorities in a woman; you stand a very good chance of avoiding all the pitfalls you fear. So I’m not telling you to end your marriage strike. Instead, I’m telling you to apply it by boycotting NOT marriage itself, but women whose mindset makes them unsuitable for marriage. Our Folk cannot afford the self-indulgence of nearly half of single men being on a marriage strike. You need to do some research, and get out there and learn in the school of hard knocks so you can find a real woman.
When single men engage the services of call girls, they are substituting a paid-for fantasy for real interaction with real women. They are playing to their visual weakness and feeding a fantasy that impossibly beautiful women can be had at the drop of a hat: women who never have a headache, never have a complaint, accommodate every desire and then leave without ever messing up the bathtub with $500 worth of hair-care products. By investing their time and money in this dead-end; men fail to gain the experience needed to properly assess the true character of women in order to be able to separate the wheat from the chafe, and they also fail to develop the social skills necessary to deal with real live women in real-life situations. So they are perpetuating their own inadequacy as suitable mates. Because such folks tend to blame others for the situation in which they find themselves, they will, of course, blame “women” rather than their own trips to fantasy land.
These men are not acting like men. They are acting like overgrown teens who replaced the X-box with a skilled prostitutes — though I frankly wouldn’t be surprise if they keep an X-box handy for weeks when funds are low. They are hiding from reality. They need to drop fantasy land. If they are truly afraid of the modern legal power-differentials; they can take the money they were spending on prostitutes and spend it on pushing forward a positive legal agenda. Or, they can put that money toward building a pre-marital financial security that can be protected with a prenuptial agreement. They also need to start seeking REAL women. You know, women who will tell you that your breath stinks or will dump you if you misbehave; women who have solid character and won’t take intentional abuse from clods; women who aren’t going to see you as a wallet, but as a partner with whom something valuable can be built cooperatively.
There are real women out there. Intelligent women with strong ethics. Women who will work with a man as part of a team and who, as long as you keep your promises to them, will not let you down. They won’t misuse their legal advantages to cuckold or manipulate a man. If you start developing yourself as a fully-faceted man rather than just a wallet, you’ll be surprised at the number of women you’ll meet who see your skills as contributing to your status in their eyes. I talk to single women all the time who are lamenting the absence of suitable mates. Your job is to put away the toys and start setting yourself up as a good husband in advance of marrying so you can present women with a full-faceted man worthy of their time and attention. You will have no shortage of potential mates.