I know those people, I come from them. They are not some shamefulabstract demographic to be brushed under the rug of euphemism by WolfBlitzer and his ilk.
As a lifelong Caucasian, I am beginning to think the time hasfinally come to take the right to vote away from white people, at leastuntil we come to our senses. Seriously, I just don’t think we can betrusted to exercise it responsibly anymore.
I give you Exhibit A: The last eight years.
In 2000, Bush-Cheney stole the election, got us attacked, and thengot us into two no-exit wars. Four years later, white people reelectedthem. Is not the repetition of the same behavior over and over againwith the expectation of a different outcome the very definition ofinsanity? (It is, I looked it up.)
Exhibit B is any given Sarah Palin rally.
Exhibit C would be Ed Rendell and John Murtha, who in separatemoments of on-the-record candor they would come to regret, pointing outthat there are plenty of people in Pennsylvania who just cannot bringthemselves to pull the lever for a black man – no matter what they tellpollsters.
These people are ruining things for the rest of us white people whoare ready to move on. Sure, they have their reasons, chimerical thoughthey may be: He’s a Muslim. He’s a terrorist. He’s a Muslim terrorist.He’s going to fire all the white people and give their jobs to blacks.
But those are just the little white lies these people allowthemselves to be told, a self-induced cognitive dissonance that letsthem avoid saying the unsayable: I cannot pull the lever for a black man.
Hey, some people just aren’t ready yet, even the governor said so.Just like some people aren’t ready yet for computers or setting theclock on the VCR.
Or, to hear Murtha tell it, some people – specifically some peoplein Western Pennsylvania – will never be ready. But the fact is, if youdid a statewide head count of racists, you’d find just as many ineastern Pennsylvania as you would in the western part of the state.
That’s why this ban on white people voting I’m proposing has got tobe statewide. And I’m sorry to say, it’s going to have to include allwhite people, even those who would vote for Obama, because you can’tjust let some white people vote. That would be unfair.
By this point, you either think I am joking or are calling me an elitist. I assure you I am neither.